How things have changed!

| March 30, 2013 | 0 Comments

Another episode in the life of John Butterfield of Cottingley.

I woke up the other night around 2.30am. I was aware of the aroma of home baking filling the entire house. I leaped out of bed (well, more like dragged myself out). My wife Wendy had just removed the hot mince pies from the oven. I popped the kettle on.

“You can get your eyes off them for a start. They’re for the coffee mornin’, all of ’em.”

So I had to make do with a couple of biscuits with my coffee. While I’m drinkin’ it, she’s lookin’ at TV page in t’local paper.

Remote controlSuddenly she says, “There’s an old film abart to start on Channel 4, can ya get it on for me?”

I say gently, “You can manage that, luv, I’m sure.”

She switches telly on at the socket, picks up the remote control and sits ’erself darn. After a bit, the TV burst into life.

“It’s on BBC 1, wot do I do now?”

“Press the right-hand side button, sweetheart.” (I might yet get a warm mince pie if I keep talkin’ like that).

She presses the button as instructed. “Nothin’s ’appened,” she states.

I say gently, “Try again, luv.”

She obeys me. “It’s still not workin’,” she says after givin’ it a good press.

So I put down my coffee, stand up, take one step towards her and spot the problem.

“You’ve got the remote wrong way round, dear.” – I’m still ’opin’ for a mince pie! “If it had been a gun you’d ’av shot yourself, twice!”

Modern technology!

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